One Blog at a time

I am still stuck on the Michael Vick story; in addition to The Senator Larry Craig Story. I was hinting at Senator Craig's allegations yesterday, and I remain just so outraged today. We, as a society, enjoy being in people's homes, in their bedrooms, and in their minds all without examining human formulation. Or, what's worse, examining what's in our own boudoir. What makes people, all people, do the things they do? We are really pushing toward a society that is going to be George Orwell's "1984" in the 21st century. A society where there is no room for privacy and no room for mistakes. What's ever more frightful is, who will be the determining agency -- or "Thought Police" if you will. As depicted in "1984", our government has installed cameras within the urban areas on every corner. They are in front of every ATM and in all the stores. Bathrooms will be next. These underground worlds, that have thrived so long, have no choice but to surface. These lifestyles are breaking through the ground with lightening speed. All of those formerly discreet, all-too-frequent sought after sex/corruption/dank occurrences, that have been in play for decades, can no longer hide. We have all known they existed, but now we gasp, as if we are so appalled.

I, in no way, condone sex in bathrooms with strangers, or any other illicit acts, but people don't just wake up and go to a rest room seeking sex with whomever is defecating in the next stall! They have histories of sexual deviance. So is it really our jobs as constituents, media hounds, late-night news anchors to humiliate these offenders? These practices have gone on for years and years! And when the next day dawns, we run to read who else is being exposed.

Well, I became angry today because I was listening to a satellite radio program whose host was commenting on the Michael Vick story. This women is a person of color, but who had a much more conservative upbringing than Mr. Vick. She was hullabaloo-ing about how awful the story is, and "how cruel" the acts were. I could only think that: with all of your "Angel-network-having capabilities", why aren't you in the inner city affecting inner city youths' thought patterns? Inner city mentality does not revolve around moral compass or etiquette! In fact, it revolves around primal basic need being met. Consuming anything to be fed. Saying anything to be heard. Having sex to quash desire. Do anything because you can.

Why aren't these folks of high standards coming out of South Africa and going into Detroit? Animal Planet has shown us for years that young black men house dogs for fighting and it is a social occurrence much as a visit to a community center or a visit to the country club would be. People assume that we all think alike. We don't.

There are scores of people who don't feed their children at sit down meals and ask them about their day in the less fortunate environments that many, many people live. So if that child happens to make it out and become a NFL football player, who is there to say, "Hey, most people with dignity eat at the table and converse about their day." "By the way, you shouldn't fight your dogs. The class you are now in doesn't do that, they kiss their dogs and buy them clothes. You could be looked at as a bad person by this group." Or if that child, who has been sexually abused, or left to develop deviant sexual behavior grows up to become a senator, who is there to say, "Hey, I know back in Idaho you used to hang out in that rest stop on route so-and-so, but now that you are a senator, you should really stop that."

In Senator Craig's case, maybe he was so ignored, or left to fend for himself that he developed these sexually deviant tendencies and no one ever addressed them. Sure it's embarrassing. Sure it is not the norm. It is offensive and reprehensible, but he
is not alone.

Who is blameless? Who is beyond reproach? How can society find a way to make everyone the way that we think we are? How can we actually achieve the moral standards that we so mightily profess? How do we clean out the closets of our lives?
How do we help our peers live better, more healthy, and more happy? My guess would be one blog at a time.

Gone to the Dogs

Okay, I don't typically dwell on current events long enough to comment on them, but when they involve a bigger picture that is a social misnomer, I need to have a say! America needs to get over itself! It needs to REALLY examine itself. The Michael Vick Story is so much more than a man abusing dogs. Here is a man from a housing project in Newport News, Virginia. Expectations that he would not be a young, black man with an inner city mentality are unrealistic.

I challenge the media to go into society to see how people really behave. It is essential we encourage conversation because we can all be ashamed. With our real selves exposed, we may begin to challenge each other to improve. The leaks of peoples' sexuality, self-abuse, marriages etcetera, are how people really live. Exposing one here and then there is not fair. All of us live. We live hard. We live gay, black, white, asian, hispanic, adulterous, religiously, defiantly, addicted, murderously and sexually. We live in an environment that wants to hide reality, but in the background lurks what we all are really like.

Where we live and where we grew up influences us in ways we like to ignore, but it is always there influencing our decisions. We judge, but we are all the same. Michael Vick grew up in the streets, in the south. Many inner city families live raw. The treatment of dogs is ignored because society ignores that many are living worse than dogs. Recently, in Chicago, I was in an inner city neighborhood observing a local youth football game. All of the families participating arrived in nice vehicles, with culture, class, and were intermingling -- evidence of socialization. The surrounding neighbors who were going on about their lives oblivious to this extra curriculum were so out of control. Little dirty boys eating cheetos, drinking that all sugar juice and water concoction that many of you probably have no idea what I am talking about--that is only available in poor neighborhoods, dragging pit-bull puppies on chains through the mud. All of the kids were just walking around aimlessly. Not one parent was seen. These kids were dirty. These kids were using language I didnt hear until I was 20 years old. These kids-- mostly under 6 years old, were back and forth, in and out, of the corner store eating: nachos, pop, candy, chips and a variety of junk. I can only assume, but there is a good chance that this is how Michael Vick grew up. I am not making excuses. My very own beloved pit SandyGirl was an 8 month old when she was rescued by 911 responding to a pit-fight in progress. The call was that a docile puppy was being used as bait. My beautiful angel was such that she was about to be thrown into the ring to rile the other dogs up. I LOVE her. I have carried this now 50lb dog outside to go potty when it rains because she doesn't like to get wet outside. I really can not imagine life without her. But, having grown up in the inner city, I am all too familiar with the realities of the day to day existence of Americans who have been forgotten. Americans of all races and creeds withering in the land of plenty.

People have complexities. People have deviance and problematic characteristics. We point and we judge and move on instead of tackling the roots of all of our societal malfunctions.

Children should be taught basic respect of self and others. Children should learn fiscal responisibility in the classroom and in camps and programs. For the children who are being raised wild, or rather not raised at all, who are only getting their basic needs met, are the ones who are in our criminal justice system. And we sit in front of our telelvisions at night after a long day at work struggling to keep our perfect lids on our perfect lives sealed tight, pointing our fingers, shaking our heads in caricature, reciting epithets and "Oh my God" as we drift off to sleep on our comfy couches to dreams of a world that does not exist.

Phrase of the day: Make a difference.

Hmmmm

Just when you think you may have a handle on this being happy thing, the Universe gives you an opportunity to put your money where your mouth is. The challenges we face can be so overwhleming. I often wonder if I am not being contemplative enough.
Propelling yourself forward is an awesome task, and sometimes so is breathing.

Then there is love. Love of ones family, friends, offsprings and lovers. We can all be so needy. We can all be so vain. We quite easily fall into the all encomposing --all indulgent "ME" syndrome. We feel wronged. We feel ignored. We feel neglected. We feel inpatience in the inability to get life to move where we want it.

How do we reconcile ourselves into being more productive outside of ourselves when things are not the way we want them? I don't have the answer to that one yet. I am confident enough to share that I may never know that answer. And maybe I shouldn't want to. These stuggles keep me fresh. Challenges keep us thinking, scheming and progressing.

Someone emailed a religious chain-mail today that struck me, (not easy to do, I too can be synical!) and it related two rooms full of people and a pot of delicious stew who could only eat with unbending arms from long wooden spoons. One room had been described as "Hell". This room had malnourished unhappy folk who would fill up their spoons and spend all of their time trying to navigate with their long spoons and unbending arms. The other room was the utopia. The occupants were fat and laughing and sharing. They had thought enough to feed each other, thus finding happiness in their situation. Hmmm.

Live Today

Is it really that hard to be happy? I was with a lifelong friend recently who was updating me on all the terrible things that have happened in their life this year. At the end of the conversation, it was said "But you know what, I am healthy and really have nothing to complain about." Once I was alone, I thought about their demeanor. There was no complaining at all. It could have easily been a "Woe-is-me" session. However, the conversation was matter-of-fact - simply-an-updating. I pondered to myself later if I could have been as poised under their circumstances. I thought, I might be devastated under their circumstances. Or, maybe not. Life deals each of us what it needs to in order for us to learn our lessons. Each of us, no matter how close we are, or far apart, have spiritual lessons that we must complete. People have overcome mass atrocities and some of us crumple because we can't pay our mortgages!

For years I kept a newspaper photo taped to my computer at work of a woman from Mozambique,Africa. In March of 2000 there were flash floods in Mozambique and this woman was forced to give birth in a tree, on a limb. Helicopters hovered attempting to help, but there was just no way to get to her until after she gave birth. She birthed her beautiful baby daughter successfully and they both lived.

I used her to remind myself that I am a whiner. I had demerol giving birth. My family and friends were surrounding me in a sterile environment with the best of care. What courage, what force of life, or nature, possessed this woman that she brought someone into this world under such dire extremes was a viand for me. It empowers and sustains me to this day. The picture has faded and disintegrated. But I searched and have managed to bring one to you. The face of courage and determination and the face of life.

Clinging to hope and life is a challenge each day for everything and everyone who draws breath. But you never know if you will be blessed enough to receive that challenge the next day. Looking at our physically challenged, our mentally challenged, our environmentally challenged and those who are just plain challenged should inspire us to not only accomplish but to live. Try it! Wake up right now and live today!